What do you do? Please post a comment describing your experience and how you respond when others look at you a certain way in passing. I just think it’s a fascinating sociocultural study.
Thursday, May 23, 2013
In Passing
I have been asking this question ever since I can remember asking questions inside my head without voicing them aloud: what is the appropriate response/behavior on my part as I pass someone on the sidewalk? At 31, I still don’t feel entirely natural when I try to smile at strangers without inviting unwanted attention—but I also don’t feel comfortable avoiding eye contact. Then I just look scared.
What do you do? Please post a comment describing your experience and how you respond when others look at you a certain way in passing. I just think it’s a fascinating sociocultural study.
What do you do? Please post a comment describing your experience and how you respond when others look at you a certain way in passing. I just think it’s a fascinating sociocultural study.
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Hi Wendy! I want to tell you that I always enjoy your reading your very thoughtful posts. I think I try to engage people on the sidewalk rather than putting them off or avoiding eye contact. But I have to admit that when strangers smile or look overtly at ME, I get a little freaked out! Then I wonder - am I freaking people out???? Possibly... I would add too that I somehow feel less weird being friendly when I have my two kids with me (3 and 1 year old). Because who would think a mom with two kids was a creep? But I'm also trying to teach them to understand the difference between being friendly and trusting that people are naturally good, while at the same time being cautious with strangers... It's a hard one!
ReplyDeleteHaha, I have had similar thoughts! Thanks for your comment and for reading. :)
ReplyDeleteMy reaction to people changes based on how confident I feel on a given day. When i'm feeling good, I'll look at someone for as long as it takes to catch their eye, then smile and say hello or good morning, whatever's applicable. If they don't respond, I just feel sorry for them. When i'm not feeling so good about myself, I'll either not look at anyone so to avoid conversation, or I'll smile a closed mouth halfsie and not say anything. Or if I do say something and get nothing back, it haunts me all day or makes me angry at them.
ReplyDeleteI was taught once (in self defense class) that we should always hold our head high, walk with purpose, and look those people in the eye for only a short minute as if to say "I see you there" - - If they have a friendly glint, you can both smile and say "Hello, enjoy the day". If they don't have a smile for you just knod a quick knod and move forward. I was told those who would do ill or harm would usually pass you by because they are looking for weaker victims. Wendy, you half smirk in this cute little picture video would be perfect on your walk! LOL
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