Yes, I'm the girl taking pictures of herself in the mirror at the gym. I just get tired of stealing other people's photos off the Internet.
I just joined this little fitness center, and today was my second day using it. I went yesterday afternoon, thinking it would be empty.
Wrong.
Full of men lifting weights and talking trash to each other. And here comes little ol' me. I actually thought I was doing pretty well, holding my own and looking like I belonged there...until I slipped a bit on the treadmill. It was a little tiny slip, but I think I uttered some kind of surprised noise. Not sure. But I just kept on running. I don't even think my face stayed red for that long. An improvement for me, for sure.
So today I went in the morning (I just love my part-time work schedule). And I was the only one there! So I took advantage--taking photos of my bad self, putting the radio on and practicing my Zumba toning moves with free weights, that kind of thing. I know, none of you would ever do anything like that, alone or not.
As I was watching my bad self in the wall-sized mirror, I was struck by how funny it was that I had given so much thought to what I wore to the gym. I really, really want to look feminine at the gym. I don't want to go in there with a bandana and no earrings, just on the off chance that someone mistakes me for an adolescent boy. So I get my zebra print scarves out and do my makeup, all for an hour of getting stinky and falling off the treadmill.
Why? If I go to the gym and men look at me, I get really creeped out. The answer is that if I go to the gym and no one is there, I actually really enjoy watching myself in the mirror--if I look the part, that is. (By the way, I get my ideas of what a workout outfit should look like from MTV's The Grind workout videos from the 90s.) If I look like I could be on a workout video, I'm happy. I guess I imagine that if I practice enough, someday I can feel as good when there are people to watch me. I know, I'm so vain. I probably think this blog is about me...
At one point during my little workout, I laughed out loud. Here I was, watching my biceps flex (if I squinted and got really close to the mirror) and keeping an eye on the door--and I was convinced I really looked good. But I'm realistic enough to know that I actually looked a bit foolish. Cool at times, but mostly foolish.
But I think that's okay. As soon as someone comes in the door, I feel like a little girl who's out of her league. But by myself, I'm really something! The point, I think, of this whole post is that we need those moments where we can stand all alone in front of a mirrored wall and bust out some moves that boost our confidence--even if the moment only lasts until another person walks in.
No matter your body shape or size, you can feel good when you look in the mirror at a gym. You can. First of all, anyone looks good with a barbell in their hand or sitting on an exercise ball.
Secondly, you are at a gym! You should feel great about making that choice. And finally, I think we all have to have some degree of love for our bodies. We get what we get, and we don't throw a fit, as they say in preschool. It can be scary to look at yourself full on like that, but if you find yourself all alone with the freedom to take it in, just enjoy who you are when no one is watching. Laugh a little but keep on dancing. Or swiveling. Or whatever it is you're doing in front of that mirror. If a bald girl can feel good in front of a mirror, so can you.
