Hostess with the Mostess

I have turned into quite the hostess. In the past couple months I have hosted Christmas dinner, a major game night, a Valentine's Day fundraiser party, a Saint Patrick's Day product party, and I have an eight-year-old's Disney-themed birthday coming up very soon. And each time I host, my stress level about being prepared has gone down. In the past when I have hosted parties, I have driven myself crazy trying to get food, decorations, activities, and even my outfit "just right". (It never worked, by the way.) But now I'm learning that taking on too much stress (well, any stress, really) has a profound effect on my mental and physical health.


So, being a hostess has increasingly become less about trying to turn my life into something I think other people will enjoy, and more about inviting people in to my life as it is (with a few little touch-ups).

Throwing a great party used to mean that I had to be the perfect hostess. That included looking the part. Red dress, hair in place (which means I had to agonize over whether to wear a wig), holding out a tray of little cucumber sandwiches. Now, I wear jeans and let the dirty dishes stay in the sink, as long as they are not peeking up over the edge. If I run out of time to make the dessert I was planning, I find some M&Ms in the cupboard and put those out. I have stopped apologizing for my odd-looking appetizers that didn't turn out like the ones on Pinterest.

And with summer coming, hopefully bringing heat with it, I intend on hosting bald. After all, hospitality is about creating shared space where real people can interact with real people, not creating a fantasy land where reality is deemed unsuitable. I have redefined hospitality and have discovered that I can be a great hostess just as I am. And people enjoy my parties, if I do say so myself. : )